sulky saturday

had japanese for dinner

nothing for lunch..

slept through breakfast time..

thought i'd enjoy a good supper with her..

but she's going out with her ex instead..

now they're friends..

so i dont really have any comments..

she did invite me along..

but... she dint seem to wish i'd come..

so i rejected her offer

here's what we said..

fish:等下跟华华出，看你要不要跟

bee:噢~怎样去？

fish:他驾车上丫丫山啦

bee:哦，那你要不要我跟？

[paused for a moment...]

fish:等下他飞车你又多多话讲噢

bee:将我没有去，他飞车我还不是会多多话讲

fish: ...

bee:不会有什么我会讲的啦

fish:随便你啦，你要去你跟我讲，我现在叫他来载我先

[click][tut~]

........ hmmm.......

do i have a point in writing this out?

yes... im being a "gia su" bf...

being afraid of things when i should gv her some space instead..

her own space to have a relationship with people she wants to

i should even gv myself some space..

sigh

its tiring to be jealous

its tiring to try to be cool

when all i can think of is her safety and hapiness

but she doesnt seem to gv a damn bout it..

so fuck it...

fuck everything that i've done..

fuck the tears and the effort

fuck the perfect love story i wanted so badly..

fuck the hope i planted in so deeply

those goals just makes me suffer even more..

so for now,

[new objective attained]:

just dont worry and be happy :)